Blame.

There's this kid I knew

Well, I still see him around sometimes, but he's not the same you know

Saw him at church not too long ago

And it was a blow to the skull because he's grown

I knew a little boy with a squeaky voice

He talked kinda funny and was always getting into trouble

He'd sneak into his sister's room through the window

Scare the heck out of her and then run off laughing

He'd steal cookies and stuff them in his shirt

And he thought he was going to be a skateboarder for real one day

Well I saw his clone at church

But the childhood was sucked out of him

He became a twelve-year-old adult just like that

And I know what's been going on behind the scenes

Dad's leaving and Mom's always angry

I didn't think I'd see him anytime soon

He was like a ghost to me

Those brows set in stone

Eyes set straight ahead at nothing

His voice deep like my friends'

He just looked

Tired

Like someone had dealt him a sack full of bruises

They probably came as sleepless nights

Yeah, he figured out real fast

That you can't trust the ones who smile

Yeah, I know it's never over 'til it's over

And I know you're good to the core

I just can't believe we did this.

Well, never say die

Because then it happens

Yeah, I know the dreams are just that

And I know I don't really watch them grow cold every single night

But I look out to the horizon

And I see clouds turning into waves

There was a storm today and how quickly we forgot

Yet I'm still sitting here watching the lightning

I think about Skinner and how she brushed by my life

I see another girl strolling through the aisle with her aunt

There's the one who broke me, and she left with a deafening whisper

And I've got to give it all up to you every time

Because you love, and you love, and you love me

Well when I think about losing him I kill him in my sleep

And I know that's not your fault

My good God, why would I blame you?

Just tell me, why is the sound of my sister showering

Such a strident cacophony?

See, I'm learning words for the test now

There's so much at stake

Well if I drift then will it be your fault?

Or will it be mine?

That's what I'm trying to figure out

I know we committed genocide and we invented disease and we crumbled that mountain

But still he dies

Every

single

night

That I fall asleep alone.

Is that my fault?

Even though I pray in tears for it to stop?

It's all I can do

And yes you're infinite and perfect

But I just have to find someone to blame.